A New Year and a Reflection on Generosity

Happy 2016!  It's hard to believe that we are already ten days into this new year.  I'm not really one to make new year's resolutions and all that, but it is an excellent opportunity to reflect on this past year and also what is to come in these next twelve months.  A few months back I had written in my journal the verse from 1 Samuel 12:24- "But be sure to fear the Lord and serve him faithfully, with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you."  Coming from a man who had been set apart to do great things for the Lord since before he was born (read about his mother Hannah and the circumstances of his birth in 1 Samuel 1, it's a great story!), these words carry a lot of weight.  There are so many gems in this one verse, but I am struck by the last phrase this morning.

"Consider what great things he has done for you."  And there are SO many great things he has done for me, for all of us!  I spent my three weeks of Christmas vacation in California, driving all over the bottom half of the State as I visited friends and family that I dearly love.  One of the great things he has done for me is to bless me with a wonderful support system of people who love me and love Him.  These past weeks, I have been shown so much generosity by so many people, and in some instances, by people I don't even know.  I want to spend a few moments mentioning some of the different forms of generosity I experienced this last part of 2015.  As someone who lives on the generous financial support of others, it is such a blessing to me when people help to supply my financial and physical needs with their generosity.

•  The use of a smart phone with cell and data service(and GPS) as I navigate around California.  Those who know me well know that I tend to get lost and don't have a great internal compass.  Using this smart phone saved me on numerous occasions.
•  Couches and spare beds to sleep on.  And the use of showers and towels and access to their food supply.  :)

  

  Sweet time with my brother and sister in law

  
  
• Many tabs picked up at restaurants as we shared a meal together.  And many delicious homemade meals made specifically for me and my cravings.
• Undivided attention as I shared what's going on in my mind and my heart, and encouragement and prayers for all that is to come in this new year of life and ministry.  So many people sharing encouraging words, hugs, and the fact that they pray for me.  This is a generosity that is immeasurable.

  

  Beautiful San Diego with some of the best friends

•  For the first time in my life I experienced a stranger in front of me paying for my food in the drive through. It really did touch my heart! 
• The second Christmas in a row that I was gifted a free ticket to Disneyland!  And it came with fun friends to enjoy the magical day with!  

  

  Fellow SI Costa Rica staff and intern friends ready for a day at Disney!

• Friends who made sure they had childcare (in many cases, their kind husbands) so that we could spend some time having "girl time" together.  I love their children, but it is so special to just be able to be ourselves together, face to face.
• And of course, mom and dad allowing me to stay at their home, come and go as I pleased, eat their food, interrupt their daily routines, etc.  They are beyond generous to me in so many ways.

As we start off this new year, I would challenge you to also consider the great things he has done for you.  I limited my list to things that I noticed only in these past weeks as I was "home" visiting friends and family.  How can I be more generous to those around me, both the people I know well and those I don't?  My old pastor from Neighborhood used to say that "we are blessed to be a blessing," so let's be a blessing to each other by being more generous!

Give Thanks

In the spirit of Thanksgiving (weekend) and wanting to focus on the goodness of the Lord and what He has done, I thought I'd write a post with that theme.  Thanksgiving isn't a thing in Costa Rica since it's uniquely a U.S. holiday, but our multicultural staff celebrated with turkey and the works on Friday evening at our leaders the Dixons' home.  I've missed Grandma Rogalsky's apple pies these past four years to be sure, but I'm grateful for the chance to celebrate together in community here.

Some of the ladies (and little Joab in the background) enjoying the Thanksgiving spread

So back to the being thankful topic at hand.  Here are just a few things that I am thankful for as I consider the past months here in life and ministry in Costa Rica:

• All of the team members and students who come down to love on kids in the Tutoring Center!  Jose and I are the staples here but these "gringos" that come bring a fresh energy, perspective, love and man power that we need to be able to do our job well.  

  

  Team McFarland, Cal Poly and Bellvue

  
   
• The fact that SI owns the Tutoring Center is a really positive thing for the community of Los Guido and our ministry.  It sends a message that we are here to stay, Lord willing, and want to continue to invest in the community around us.

  

  Our new sign to let everyone know who we are when they walk past our building!

• New kids always find their way to our door!  Oftentimes the season after summer and all of our extra helpers have gone, we see a drop in attendance by some of the kids.  But the moms and kids themselves are great advertisers for us, and we have welcomed new faces this fall when some of our old faces have taken a break from studying with us.

  

  The two kids in the front right are new and faithful attenders.  Those are my cool parents in the back. :)

• A new church that I have become a part of these past six months or so.  Having attended an English speaking church for the majority of my time in Costa Rica, I felt God leading me to find one that worshiped in Spanish.  My friend MacKenzie and I have been attending a church led by a young Tico pastor who is passionate about the Bible and Jesus, and we have felt welcomed there.
• Although our 4th-7th grade girls' group's attendance has not been as consistent as I would like to see, our study of "Grandes Mujeres de la Biblia," (Important Women of the Bible) has been going really well!  They are remembering who and what we are talking about from week to week, and are excited to read and discuss what God's Word says about these godly women.

  

  MacKenzie leading a discussion about Hannah.  LOTS of girls came the day I took this picture.  :)

•    All of the financial and prayer supporters of both the Tutoring Center and me personally!  Chances are, if you are reading this, that means you!  I'm so thankful for the people who are invested in this ministry and make it possible that it continues.  

There are MANY other things that I am thankful for that I could include here.  In a world where there is so much pain and ugliness around us, it is so valuable to take time to reflect on His goodness and good deeds.  What things are YOU thankful for?  

A lifelong learner

When I was an undergrad and then a teacher credential student at Fresno Pacific University, I heard a lot about the idea of being a "lifelong learner."  I received an excellent education and gained a lot of knowledge in college, but that did not mean that I was ready to take on all that teaching in a public school in a small farming community at the edge of a big city had to throw at me.  I learned so much those 5 1/2 years of teaching in Fowler, CA, and it was a wonderful place to do ministry through the noble occupation of public school teacher.  Fast forward to 2015 (ten years after graduating from FPU!!) and I am continuing to learn, every day.  Living in Costa Rica outside the capital city, I am in much more of an urban setting than I ever have been before.  Add to that the difference between being from a first world country and living in a developing country, there are many many differences and things to be learning and growing in.  

There are so many things that I wish I could change about the systems and way of life here, especially in the community of Los Guido where I work at the Tutoring Center.  My students receive such a sub par education that it's almost a surprise when they DO have class.  There is not a substitute system in their school district, so if the teacher has a meeting or conference or illness or whatever, there's no class that day.  It is so unfair because these children have so much potential to learn and develop into contributing members of society, but I just don't see their education being valued as it should by the powers that be.  The Tutoring Center exists to be an extra support to what they are learning and working on at school, but if they aren't at school, our job becomes a lot more challenging in trying to fill in all the huge gaps that are left.

The entire county that I live and work in has been a place of strife the past year or so, and a lot of it has to do with a territorial drug war that exists.  I don't understand that stance that the law enforcement takes sometimes and why they don't do more to help solve this issue.  I realize it's way more complex than I could ever understand or imagine, but it is heartbreaking to hear my students talk about the gunshots they sometimes hear at night and see in their eyes not necessarily a fear but an acceptance that this is part of their "normal" of life.  

These problems are not unique to Costa Rica or Los Guido.  Our world is broken, and thus systems are less than perfect and people don't love and value one another as God desires us to.  We can read the news feeds or turn on the television and just get so overwhelmed that we just want to curl up and shut it all out.  We can decide to go numb or on the other extreme, become so self-involved that we don't care about what is going on in the world around us.  God has been teaching me lately that He has given all of us a place to live and to serve, and we need to do that the best we can, with the help of the Holy Spirit, where we are in this moment.  I can't solve the issues of the Costa Rican public school system.  But I can be available for those 10+ kids who are going to show up on Tuesday morning to study with Jose and me, and do my best to love them, point them to Jesus, and remind them of their potential.  

I pray that I will always be learning, seeking how I can be a part of bringing restoration to this broken world.  To be the hands and feet of Jesus.  And I pray that you will do your part as well.

Here are some pics of what I've been up to lately!

A 4 year old's pirate birthday party with these SI friends

My friend Mallory, a cute little blond pirate

Two of my silly second graders that have become really great readers.  I'm a proud teacher.

Getting out of the city for a day of sun at the beach.

Seeing the bigger picture

I am so thankful for my SI Costa Rica family.  Here we are pictured with our summer interns and a group from California that was with us for two weeks this summer.  As a staff, we are all so different from each other; age, gender, nationality, conflict style, leadership style, personality...but at the end of the day, we all are committed to being a part of this multicultural missions organization.  We share the same vision of seeing students (the North Americans who come to work with us) and the poor (community members) transformed into the likeness of Christ and discover their true calling.  

The Centro de Tutoria is undergoing some construction work and we decided that it would be better to close the Center for a few days because of the noise and dirt and disturbance.  That meant that Jose and I needed to find another place to be in the meantime.  As much as I missed my kiddos from Los Guido, it was SO GOOD to spend time with some of my coworkers and see what they do at their different ministry sites.  It is one thing to hear them talk about their kiddos and ladies that they work with, and it is another thing to see it for yourself.  I got to meet a young man in Las Fuentes who is working hard to make different life choices and actually just came home from a spiritual retreat through his church today.  I spent a day with my coworker Norma talking with both victims and perpetrators of bullying in a public school, with the goal being to get to the bottom of the hurt that is causing the mistreatment of their fellow students.  And I was able to help with an English class that we had for a group of teenage mommies, who had to grow up way too early in order to take care of their own babies.  We cannot change their life choices after the fact, but can help  be a part of them making better choices in how they parent and have relationships in the present and the future.

Sometimes I wonder if what we are doing in the communities really matters.  When we see situations of drug use and child abuse and violence and alcoholism happening in the homes of the kids and the women that we work with- does our presence in their lives make a difference?  We can get discouraged when we see hard situation after hard situation.  But I was reminded this week that we are called to plant seeds and to be faithful.  Sometimes we might get to see the fruit of our labor.  God has been so generous to me in showing me a bit of "fruit" when I think about some of my former high school youth group students in California and how they are following Jesus wholeheartedly now that they are college students.  But we are not promised that we will see fruit- Paul even said in 1 Corinthians 3:6 "I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow."  That's the key- it will be up to God when and how and where it will grow.  For now, I want to keep on planting seeds in the children and students that I work with.  And trust him to be faithful in the rest. 


As I said before, I'm encouraged by my staff and the different ministry sites that we have around Desamparados.  I am thankful that I now have a better understanding of what is happening in the Las Fuentes house and La Capri school and the Woodshop and the Microfinance groups.  (I could also talk about Sports and my friends in the Office and Child Sponsorship, but I didn't spend time with them this week.  But they certainly are being faithful to the call that God has given them here in Costa Rica as well.)  I see Jesus in my coworkers and I see why He has each of them in the ministry sites that they are assigned to.  May we each be faithful to plant the seeds where we are placed!

I wanna go deeper...

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations for ever and ever!  Amen.  Ephesians 3:20-21

I believe that the Lord has been taking me on a journey these past months and challenging me to dig deeper and decide if I really REALLY believe in His promises, in His love for me.  These verses written above are an incredible promise that He has given to us- "immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine."  What?!  I feel like I can ask and imagine a lot.  And He's able to do so much more than that?  But I think the rub for me lately has been situations where I cannot imagine a good result or ending, where my faith is limited.  Pastor Steve from my home church Neighborhood Church has been told he has only a few months left to live because of a terminal brain cancer- do I truly believe that God could perform a miracle in his life?  And if that miracle does not come for Steve on this side of heaven, do I believe that God is still mighty and powerful and "to him be the glory?" 

I would imagine that I'm not alone in desiring to go deeper but also struggling a bit with some of the implications of these scriptures and promises.  I'm a bit late jumping on the bandwagon here, but during this past week that I've been off of work for a much needed vacation I read "Anything" by Jennie Allen.  (Sidenote: I read the original version she wrote in 2011 and am interested in getting the updated version that contains the companion Bible study).  But anyway, for those who haven't read the book, the premise is making the decision to stop chasing after things of this world, to once and for all surrender and abandon our lives and all of it's decisions to the Lord, and be willing to say "God, I/we will do anything for you."  To be completely honest, I don't know if I'm there yet- if I'm ready to say that I would do ANYTHING.  Anything, could mean, well, anything!  I realize that sounds redundant, but I don't want to think about God potentially calling me to be single for a lot longer or to go somewhere where I don't really want to go.  Selfish, I know, when I reflect on what God has done for me.  

But this is where I'm at right now.  Feeling challenged to go deeper, to be willing to be stripped of those things that I hold on to too tightly.  This season after our busy team season and when we don't have a semester program and it's just going to be Jose and Tara at the Tutoring Center for the near future- it's going to become a bit routine and challenging in a different way.  This is something I wrote recently in my prayer journal regarding this new chapter of life and ministry in Costa Rica: "...I want to give it (this post-team season) to you ahead of time.  I pray that you continue to use this season to take me deeper in you, to show me new things and grow me more.  I pray for creativity for Jose and myself in how we interact with and love on our kids.  I pray that you would renew our vision for them, remind us of why we are here, why you called us to SI and the Tutoring Center." 

Having a week off from being at the Tutoring Center is good and healthy.  Getting calls and texts from students who didn't know we were off and were asking if we can put them on the list for studying that afternoon is a reminder that we matter in this community.  There have been so many wonderful moments in the last months of light bulbs turning on and connections being made for both our Los Guido kids and the team members from the States.  Below are some pics of special moments and reminders of why we are here and of what the Lord is doing in all of our lives.

Full house as we watch Jose put on a spectacular puppet show!  He is so creative in sharing the Gospel with the kids in many different forms.

Three awesome college girls who loved on our kids, were wonderful servants, and are considering what the Lord has ahead of them in terms of teaching and missions.

We prayed up on the "mountain" with each group this summer, but this time was especially precious when we had a group of our kiddos join us.  And our sweet and sassy 4th grader Keylin had us all in tears when she prayed her own heartfelt prayer to our God.

We don't often have adult men on our outreaches to the Centro, and it was really fun to have two men from Texas join us for our last outreach.  Pictured here are Andy and Fabian, who really were able to figure out how to communicate and joke around across the language barrier.

"Let us become more aware of Your presence."

Where has the summer gone?!  It seems like just yesterday we were saying goodbye to our spring semester students and now we only have an outreach and a half to go before our "summer season" is over with.  I am so thankful that we have had the opportunity to work with so many wonderful high schoolers, college students, and adults over the past months in the Tutoring Center.  Every two weeks, new faces come in and are nervous about the language barrier, but are excited to love on our kids and help them the best that they can with their homework and test prep and art projects.  It is also such a joy to see how they fit into the vision of the Tutoring Center, and how by the end of day 3 they have started to build friendships with our kids that will continue into the second week of their outreach with us.

What about me?  What have I been learning these past months?  I will admit, sometimes in the hustle and bustle of trying to get the English speakers plugged in with the Spanish speakers and spending time with the interns and planning art lessons and Bible time- I don't have a lot of energy left to focus on me.  There is a danger in "doing missions without Jesus" because this work I do here is my job.  It is how I pay the bills, in a sense.  And it can become automatic- every other Wednesday morning I talk with the team about storing up treasures in heaven rather than treasures on earth, and about the importance of not worrying because each day has enough troubles of it's own.  Every morning and afternoon we pray with our team to start and end our work day.  Every Monday at staff meeting we talk about the Bible together.  I would imagine that anyone who has been in formal church or missionary ministry can understand where I'm coming from. 

But God is faithful and when I take the time to listen to the Holy Spirit, He continues to speak to me, to challenge me, to grow in me.  During one of our outreaches this summer we sang the song "Holy Spirit" every morning during devotions, and I was really struck by some of the lyrics: (speaking about the Holy Spirit)- "Let us become, more aware of your presence.  Let us experience the glory of your goodness."  As a believer, the Holy Spirit's presence is constantly with me.  I don't have to ask for His presence to be with me.  But I do need to be aware of His presence, to welcome His presence. 

We have also been going through Ephesians as a staff, focusing a lot on unity in the Body of Christ.  There are so many nuggets of truth that can be taken from those passages, including the idea of being really careful about the words we use and the talk we talk, but rather, "speak to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs.  Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."  Now I don't know how literal we are supposed to take that, as in, do we really need to go around singing songs to each other all the time?  (Sidenote- I do LOVE musicals, so maybe that wouldn't be such a bad idea. ;) )  But that part about always giving thanks for everything- if I'm giving thanks, it's pretty hard to say something rotten to or about someone.  If I'm giving thanks, it's hard to have a negative attitude towards someone.  That's where I'm at right now- wanting to be more aware of the Holy Spirit's presence in my life and to allow Him to renew my mind so that I can have more of an attitude of thanks that changes the way I speak to others. 

Transitioning from there- what would a blog post be without some photos of what's going on at the Tutoring Center?  Two weeks ago my students had their two week vacation from school, and we did a lot of fun workshops and a few field trips with the kids.  Below are some highlights of those activities.

Water Day!  It was a bit overcast this afternoon, but they had a blast!

Girls' club! 

So excited for our field trip to the National Stadium

Everyone was thrilled to be on the field level at the Stadium

Baking fruit pizzas with our 4-6 graders

1-3 graders enjoying their fruit pizzas.  They are adorable children, they just don't like smiling for pictures, apparently.

A picture is worth a thousand words

Many times when I sit down to write a blog, I have a topic or a theme that I would like to write about.  Some deep thoughts that I'd like to share with my faithful blog readers and supporters.  Tonight I would like to share a few different pictures and some short stories that go along with them, just to change it up.  Kind of like a snapshot of what's been going on around here and in my life the past month or so.

 This sweet first grade girl has been coming to the Centro since the beginning of this school year, and I really am encouraged by her enthusiasm for learning to read.  It does not come naturally for her, and she has missed quite a bit of school in the past.  There have been times during our "recess" breaks that she wants to read instead of going out to play with the other kids.  I love that she knows that she can come to the Tutoring Center and receive the extra attention that she really needs, as well as be in a place that is full of love and acceptance.

 The Tutoring Center is located near a pretty significant hill, and when you climb up that hill like we did in this picture, you are able to look out over the entire community and see the homes and schools and churches and corner stores that the children and their families frequent.  It has been a really powerful thing for us, as a group of full time staff and short term team members, to pray over the community of Los Guido, the Tutoring Center, and the families that we work with.

 UNO!  It would be safe to safe that Uno is played daily at the Tutoring Center.  Homework and studying for tests is our first priority, but after we have finished their tasks and done some reading from books in our library, the Uno cards come out.  I like to think that they are learning number sense, sportsmanship, reasoning skills, among other things.  And it is a great way to incorporate our English speaking short term team members. 

There are so many special students that I have known over the three + years that I've been working at the Centro.  These two girls are in 5th and 6th grade, and have been an important part of our upper grades group and my girls' group on Friday.  When I hear them talk about things of faith, their (mostly good) decisions regarding friendships and relating with peers, and see their desire to study and be a part of our program, it reminds me that what we do here is worth it.  It matters to these students, and they matter to us. 




Please keep us in your prayers as we are in the middle of a busy summer season of short term teams coming and going every two weeks.  "Bringing students and the poor together cross-culturally to encounter God, share the Good News, disciple and serve others in occupational ministries."  That's the mission of Students International, and why we are working at the Tutoring Center day after day.  Thanks for all your support of our ministry!!