Tara Talk: Everyone's got a story to tell

This week has been quite trying for me. My wonderful work partner, Jose, got married last Saturday and has been on his honeymoon this week, which means I've been at the Tutoring Center on my own. I realized how much I appreciate having someone else there to bounce ideas off of, share in the responsibilities (and discipline), and also to help me explain myself when I'm not able to find the words to use in Spanish. I also made the mistake of allowing too many kids in during our tutoring sessions because I have a hard time turning kids away. The truth is, I cannot manage 12 students who are all working on different homework/practices in Spanish and need to have things explained to them and work revised. I am not Wonder Woman. That being said, I also learned this week that the Lord supplies my needs when I breathe out those short "Help me," or "Jesus!" prayers, such as I did this week.

In spite of a crazy week, I feel like God is teaching me more about His people and His heart through some of the stories that people shared with me or that I was a part of this week. At church this week we were reading about Isaac and Rebekah in Genesis, but looking more intently at Abraham's servant and the emphasis he placed on a daily, ongoing relationship with the God of Abraham as demonstrated by the way he prayed to the Lord about everything. One of the high school boys from the community where I work was sharing with me that his "normal" is that his father moved out when he was young and that his mother has had a string of boyfriends since then. When I asked him if it is hard for him to see his mom with men that aren't his father, he responded that it is just the way it is here and he doesn't think of it as anything strange. Wednesday night we had an evening discussing poverty and what the Bible has to say about it with our semester students. It's challenging and also encouraging to know a bit of God's heart on this subject and as Christians we have quite a responsibility to care for the body of Christ. And there was the conversation we had in girls' club on Friday about sexual purity, wanting to make different choices than their mothers and family members before them, and other similar topics. Such wisdom from these young girls, and I just want to take them all home and protect them from this sinful world.

When I think about all the conversations I have with students from age 6 all the way to age 26+, it's no wonder I feel mentally and emotionally exhausted sometimes! Working with people is hard and always will be hard because of the investment it requires. But it is worth it. It is so exciting to see those "light bulbs" click on or to hear that person open up to you who hadn't done so before. And just like being a teacher in the States, I know that my time with each "student" that I work with is limited, and at the end of the day, they go to their home and I am not there to have influence. It broke my heart to know where some of my Malaga students were going home to in Fowler, CA, and it breaks my heart knowing what goes on or who isn't going to eat that night in Los Guido, Costa Rica. But that is why I want to love them and show them Jesus when I can, when I have them. That's my responsibility and I have to trust that God is bigger than me and Students International and can and will work in their hearts and lives as well. He doesn't need us at all. He could do it all on His own, as one of my FPU friends said on Wednesday night. But He asks us to join in. Thank you, Lord. Thank you that you want us/me, even though we are broken people.